Mule Girl Shenanigans by Cindy K Roberts

Mule Girl Shenanigans (book)

More silly tales that will delight any horse or mule girl. Barn stories that have been grouch tested! Available at Amazon Prime and other participating outlets.

Curing The Rainy Day Blues—The Cowgirl Way
Cowboy The Paint Horse – The Horse With A Big Ego
Bubba The Mule – He Was Obnoxious As They Come
Dollar The Rehab Mule – Wore Out His Welcome – Couldn’t Keep His Zipper Up
The Boenker Mule Farm—Where Every Critter Is Family
Cowgirl Points and How to Collect Them – Important Stuff Here
How to Have Fun With a Broken Arm – Just In Case You Break You Arm!
When I Am an Old Mule Woman – How I Will Spend My Winters
Chick Magnet Horses – The Ones For Those That Can’t Get A Date
Working with A Smart Ass – It’s Job & Someone Has To Do It!
Living  By the Code of The West – Morals To Live By
Hearts and Horses – Therapeutic Horsemanship – A Warm & Fuzzy Tale
Ma’am, Please Leave – Places I Wore Out My Welcome
Don’t’ Forget to Live Today – You Gotta Get Out & Let Go
Campfire Memories – The Story Of Jesus & His Burnt Up Leg
The Lone Horseman – The One And Only
Donkey, Another Love Story – Have You Ever Been Swooned By A Donkey?
Kicking Up Dust In Deadwood – Middle Age Won’t Stop Us
The Cowgirl Spirit – Just What It Means
They Almost Got Away With It – Rediculous News Tales
The Meaning Of Saddle Pals – Embrace Your Horsey Friends

The Queen of Hearts Is Your Best Bet

The saga continues. The sequel to Desperados Of The Wagons West Expedition. Descendants of notorious outlaws, muleskinners, horse thieves, brothel workers, wagonmakers, as well as Texas Rangers try to reform, return to private life and earn an honest trade. Not long after losing the posse and starting a new life in Oklahoma, a restless Sagebrush Sandy takes up with Cisco Kid. A new town in Missouri emerges, “Panther Creek” ran by head-honcho Miss Melinda, who calls on the Texas Rangers to help keep law and order. To promote business, Miss Melinda summons the Brothel Inspector to open up an upscale establishment to attract elite gentlemen. The desperados, eluding from the law, drift into town to stake a claim and make a fast play; hoping to make the cut, to compete in the first annual poker tournament, held at Panther Creek Saloon. All eyes are on the dealer.

Available at Every Cowgirl’s Dream, Amazon Books, and other participating outlets.

Mules, Coffee and Oatmeal Cookies

Mules, Coffee and Oatmeal Cookies
Mules, Coffee and Oatmeal Cookies by Cindy K. Roberts

I am proud to release this book, it was fun to write and there are heartfelt stories about my experiences with mules, horses and donkeys over the years. Every mule fart has been documented, including mule cocktail recipes along with my tips on mule care products. 167 pages of shenanigans that will tickle your funny bone! It is available now on Amazon Prime at this link: https://www.amazon.com/Mules-Coffee-Oatmeal-Cookies-Inspiration/dp/B0857BR1TW/ref=sr_1_3?dchild=1&keywords=mules%2C+coffee+and+oatmeal+cookies%2C+cindy+k+roberts&qid=1584285113&sr=8-3

Mules are so definitive

Trimming around the corral.

Mother Nature made them this way. Decisive on their likes and dislikes, they are judgmental animals. You might say they view things in black and white. Either they like it or they absolutely don’t. It’s not that the mule has ESP or can read your mind, but he is very good at reading the situation. And a mule isn’t going to work at something that he doesn’t like.

Mules are sensitive; they have a keen sense of smell, acute hearing and they are athletic like his horse mother. The thinking side of the mule comes from his father the jack. This is what makes this hybrid a unique animal to work with. Their high sense of self-preservation is what makes the mule an excellent trail partner. They certainly won’t allow them to be in a situation that could cause them harm.

Comfort is everything to the mule. They will not tolerate ill treatment or endure incorrectly fitted tack, saddles or a saddle pad that does not allow for good wear or comfort. Behavior issues will quickly develop if the mule is in discomfort or suffering from pain. A mule that is experiencing discomfort may toss his head, try to rush downhill, buck, kick out, move sideways, gape at the mouth or even rear.

If the mule’s negative behavior escalates, a vet or massage therapist may be the answer.

If you are needing to find an answer for your situation I am glad to talk with you. Call or text 314-971-0208 or email me cindy@everycowgirlsdream.com. www.everycowgirlsdream.com/store.html

Cowgirl Points -How to Collect Them

By Cindy K Roberts 

In the rodeo world, an established point system that scores a rider’s performance is used. For example, a judge awards points primarily for spurring action in bareback and saddle bronc riding. The rider loses points if his toes are not turned out with his spurs in contact with the horse; if spurring is not continuous throughout the ride; and if he is not balanced and in control. Points are gained or lost according to the rider’s rhythm and timing with the horse’s bucking. Now, in bull riding, points are scored by the rider maintaining body control and position regardless of what the bull is doing. Spurring is not required in bull riding, but definitely adds points to the score. When it comes to scoring the stock, high kicking action with hind legs fully extended makes for a better score. This all adds up to a better show and yes rodeo is a sport, it takes balls and one must be an athlete.

 The established point system in the cowgirl world is similar. Points are gathered from the first pony ride to the very last barn dance, these special moments build up the very ego of a special woman that is connected with her horse or mule. The greater the experience the higher the points and the more accomplished the rider feels. Unforeseen events or screw-ups work against the point system and are hard on the ego. Screw-ups such as getting dumped; you could get dumped by your horse or you could very well get dumped by your boyfriend; we know that neither is good…very stressful to the cowgirl’s ego. Pride is weighed in heavily on this point system; a gal has bragging rights on the very event that is recorded as an accomplishment or milestone in her western world. Life is competitive around the barn and ranches; scoring high is essential.

An example on how the cowgirl goes about to collect her points: to score points one must be subjected to a series of events that involves moving hay, catching loose stock, training mules and horses, fixing fence, gatherin’ strays and doctoring livestock. . . just to name a few. Of course, while performing these necessary barn or ranch assignments the cowgirl will be subjected to a certain amount of sweat, pain, blisters, possible burns, bruises, swelling, sprains, fractures, breaks, tears and at times . . . blood. As one may have guessed, blood will help you score higher as well as the sprains, fractures and breaks; throwing in a mule into this mix is clearly a bonus. Being subjected to mud puddles or taking in some dust rates lower on the score sheet. Cleaning tack as necessary as it is, also rates lower on the score sheet as well along with feeding the barn cats.

It seems that the more mileage one can get out of telling a story regarding one’s own scrape with nature or their last heroic triumph in breaking their last mule, adds a little spark to the tale itself. Including heightened details to your discussion on concussions, memory loss, staggering to find your way back after being thrown on the trail is what sets fire to the cowgirl soul. You see, there’s something about a war story, in this case a cowgirl’s adventure tale, that brings a flame to the listener’s ear.  The more drama ensued into the story higher points are earned. No one wants to hear a lame story on how the cat food was bought on sale for the barn cats, pouring the remainder in airtight containers and taking inventory of the felines lined up for dinner.  Shoveling manure is not rated high for story telling either. Even though shoveling manure is necessary, it is listed in the average B rating in the points category, simply because it does not require a higher skillset to do the task. But . . . to hear the story on how mule cowgirl, Prairie Rose got caught up in the high and mighty Missouri River from her mule slipping into the treacherous waters with sinking sludge underneath him, she clinging to the saddle horn, then to ride out the muddy rapids to the other side; that true tale itself will take one’s breath away! Yes, that is one worth talking about! You can easily imagine the snakes and snapping turtles lurking through the waters, not to mention the turkey vultures hovering above!

The time you rode the northern slope one sunny February afternoon, your mule slipped on a patch of frozen ground; all of a sudden, went down, crashed on his side, pinned your leg to the ground, then to end up with a sprained ankle. Crawling on hands and knees to find a strong limb to support you, this all adds special affects to the story. Never mind that your mule stood there at the bottom of the hill waiting for your return, licking and chewing the whole time. You are going for the round of bonus points. This is your opportunity to add the part, you called your mule that promptly walked up and waited patiently as you struggled to get back on. The bigger the injury, the more sloped over in the saddle one should be when returning to camp or the barn. All these treacherous details are not spared in a good cowgirl adventure story. By the way, this is important stuff here: everyone leaves out the part about tetanus shots, antibiotics and ointment. There’s something about tetanus shots, ointment and gauze bandaging that doesn’t really appeal to the readers or listeners of a cowgirl up story; if you want to remain popular, you just don’t mention it.

Getting lost on the trail is not considered a heroic experience for earning points, because you are supposed to have enough sense not to get lost in the first place. However, if one had to use their knife or pistol in order to survive while trying to find their way, then that places the event into a whole new category. Anytime you add bears, struggling with a big cat or your mule was standing guard for coyotes, the points are higher and that is something worth writing home about.    

The everyday actual tasks that rank high on the cowgirl Richter scale: roping wild mini-donks to corral them for the farrier visit, herding up young mules for their vaccinations, sorting mules for the pack string and moving cows to the other pasture; these are factual accounts of a cowgirl’s day that is worth some salt in talking about. Giving yourself stitches, cauterizing a wound or drinking out of a hoof print certainly ranks high up there for gaining cowgirl points and will entertain your listeners for a long while.

There are special and cherished moments that will never be forgotten; giving birth has a special meaning and raising children are all time extra points for the living cowgirl. Helping to deliver a newborn foal into the world, bottle feeding an orphan calf, doctoring a sick horse . . . these challenges cowgirls embrace in their own lives. Cowgirls take responsibility in their everyday chores at home and work; they take pride in their work and they wear it well. They live, eat, drink and sleep the cowgirl lifestyle. They contribute to everyone around them, they share and help others. They breathe in the cowgirl essence into their very soul. Live life well and score high amigos.      ~Cindy K. Roberts